I swear, these are getting longer and longer

4) I’m not the best at receiving or giving gifts.

I almost always have to fake a certain degree of enthusiasm after unwrapping presents. It’s not that I *dislike* what I get, it’s just that I have a hard time getting excited about getting new stuff, no matter what it is and it is very difficult to surprise me. I think I actually experience more joy receiving a wrapped present and knowing that someone wanted to gift me a gift, than receiving the actual gift that’s inside. The anticipation can be fun, but I often find the results a little anti-climatic.

It’s not that I’m picky and don’t like what I find, or that I buy all the stuff I might want to find on my own already, it’s just that I don’t want things that much. Even if there are things I’d like (like an iPhone, a digital SLR, a Macbook – who doesn’t want those things?), I nearly always find a way to put off acquiring them long enough to forget that I wanted them.

When it comes to gifts, it’s always the thought that counts most for me, so unless the item is especially meaningful/insightful/personal – unless I appreciate the *thought* behind the gift, I’m likely to prefer a heartfelt note in a card over something given just for the sake of having a gift to give, or something really expensive. The things I look forward to the most when my family sends me care packages are always the hand written letters and comic strips that have been drawn for me. I actually find the expensive purchases most satisfying to acquire on my own – there’s something about the ease of obtaining really nice things that make you appreciate it less.

I would’ve snorted at the expensive perfume Christopher got me for Christmas (though I didn’t know it was an expensive brand name at first) except that it wasn’t the cliché “give-girls-perfume” gift. I found out it took a lot of work for him to find the perfect scent for me, and I love smelling just the way he wants me to. The reason I love that gift is because that is something I can do for him, not so much something he did/got for me.

Don’t mistake it for ingratitude. I appreciate being thought of for the gift, but don’t go through that much trouble or spend any money to get me something *perfect*, all it’ll do is make me feel obligated to do something back (and honestly, I probably wouldn’t have thought to get you a gift otherwise). It sounds terrible, but there just seems to be an important element to this gift-giving/receiving thing that I am missing completely.

That having been said, I’m also a terrible gift giver. I am really generous with my funds, and I really do enjoy doing something nice for someone else, so it’s not that I’m stingy or selfish, it’s just that I forget sometimes how much a gift might mean to someone, and I’m really bad at preparing things ahead of time and miss so many deadlines for gift giving that I just forgo them completely. There are exceptions, but most often, in the event that I do shop for someone, it’s in a hurry and the gifts end up being not very well thought out or meaningful. There: you have been warned.

For future reference though, if you want to get me more than a card: I can never do with too many pairs of earrings or board/card games (though you’ll need to find out which ones I already have and would enjoy). IF you have good taste and know my size, I really love getting clothes and shoes because it adds variety to my wardrobe and saves me the trouble of having to go shopping when I am not very confident about my sense of fashion.